


Cas and Dean go to Hot Topic

by croatoanwholock



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 10x20, Crack, Homophobic language tw, I promise it's not bad, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-30
Updated: 2015-04-30
Packaged: 2018-03-26 10:42:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3847930
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/croatoanwholock/pseuds/croatoanwholock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean Winchester has died, multiple times. He’s killed monsters and demons and talked shit to Satan himself. But here in Hot Topic? He’s way out of his depth. And Cas, who still looks like a tax accountant? They stick out like sore thumbs.</p><p>Basically, my version of how Claire ended up with that ridiculous grumpy cat plush.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Cas and Dean go to Hot Topic

**Author's Note:**

> Slight spoilers for 10x20?
> 
> Reviews make my day. :')

Some part of Castiel knows it’s Claire’s eighteenth birthday. Most likely it’s the connection to his vessel ( _Jimmy, poor Jimmy_ ). That unfortunate soul had gone through many hard times, and most of them were none other than Cas’ fault. The only reconciliation to that was that Jimmy Novak’s soul has been peacefully in heaven for a long, long time. 

So Claire is finally eighteen – an adult. In reality, she’s been one for a very long time. She's been through too much. Between that milestone and her current state of being in the hospital, Cas _has_ to get her a birthday present.

Humans have weird traditions. The concept of a birthday party or gifts makes no sense to Cas. Christmas and Easter have almost nothing to do with Jesus, and more to do with buying things. Luckily, he knows some humans. So Cas has does the logical thing and calls Dean.

The hunter picks up on the first ring. “Hey, Cas. What’s up?”

The angel smiles at the phone, even though there’s no way his best friend could see it through the device. “It’s good to hear from you Dean. I'm not bothering you right now, am I? I need your help.” 

“Is everything alright?” Dean’s tone changes completely. He vaguely sounds like a worried parent. Of course, he _was_ one to Sam years ago. Despite Cas' long history with the Winchesters (both before and after Cas made his existence known), the reality of their situations often seem unbelievable. Dean and Sam always have so much burden placed on them.

Cas chuckles. “Yes, yes, of course. Um, it’s Claire’s birthday. I don’t know what to get her.”

Dean sighs loudly. “Christ. Alright, where are you? I’ll pick you up in the car.”

 

That’s how Cas and Dean end up wandering in an Oklahoma mall.

“So what do teenagers like?” Cas asks. 

Dean shrugs. “Not a freaking clue, man. Teens this generation are _crazy_. Well, she won’t want clothes. I mean girls are into shopping but you don’t know her size or what she likes. Movies and CDs are also a no.” 

“Well that _does_ limit most of the stores in the mall. What about that over there?” Cas points to a store with a black exterior and loud music.

“Eh, what the hell?” Dean heads up the escalator, leaving Cas to shuffle behind him.

 

Dean Winchester has died, multiple times. He’s killed monsters and demons and talked shit to Satan himself. But here in Hot Topic? He’s _way_ out of his depth. And Cas, who still looks like a tax accountant? They stick out like sore thumbs. Everyone else in the store is almost goth. Everyone turns to stare when they walk in.

An employee with bright pink hair and at least ten face piercings comes over. She’s in all black, and her eyes are completely circled in black liner. Dean wants to ask her if she’s been hit in the face. He can’t help but mumble a _Cristo_ when she walks over.

“Hey there!” She says in a surprisingly cheery voice. “What can I help you two with?”

“Hi… Mandy.” Cas squints at her name tag. “My, uh, daughter. It’s her birthday and I want to get her something.” 

The employee relaxes. “How old is she?”

“Sixteen?” Cas guesses. He really should know.

Dean corrects him. “Eighteen.”

She nods slowly and gives them an odd look. “Okay. Well, we have teeshirts over here, jewelery on the right, and down there are stuffed animals and accessories.”

They thank her and try to figure out what Claire might be into. Mandy hovers over them as they browse. Eventually she asks them, “So, are you two like _homosexuals_?”

Dean chokes. “I don’t swing that way, lady.”

“We don’t really get men your age in here… alone. I’m sorry. I don’t mind, really. My cousin’s a lesbian and she’s okay. But my manager… we don’t allow you to purchase things here. Our religion doesn't believe in practicing your lifestyle. It’s… unnatural. I’m sorry, but I need to ask you to leave. Target across the street is more _liberal_."

It's weird how she says liberal like a dirty word. For most of human history, being progressive was seen as a good thing. Cas feels very unsettled. Him and Dean are very close, yes, but they've been through a lot together. He has no problem with the assumption that they would be romantically involved. Cas doesn't see it as insult, and his best friend is handsome. Despite all of this, Cas knows it's not his place to correct this soul. Humans have free will, and that gives them the right to believe what they want. It's not his place. Dean, on the other hand, isn't as calm about the whole thing.

Dean stands up straight. He glances at Cas, who has a calm, blank expression on his face. “What, does this make you uncomfortable?” He asks the employee.

She nods.

"Oh, my bad." Dean grabs the angel by the trench coat and kisses him. He's not sure which of the two of them are more shocked. Mandy actually shrieks. Cas, on the other hand, is just a terrible kisser. His lips are chapped and he’s inexperienced, to say the least. But that’s not the point. Dean pulls away and adjusts his coat. 

“Don’t make me call security.” Mandy takes out her walkie-talkie. He puts his hands up and walks out quickly. They make it down the escalator and out of the mall.

 

Once they’re in the Impala, Dean takes a stuffed cat out of his shirt. “I got a present.” 

“You stole a stuffed cat while you were kissing me?” Cas tilts his head and stares at his friend in confusion. 

“I don’t like bigots.” Dean says, as if that explains everything. “I’m not gay.”

“Sexuality is a spectrum, Dean, not a binary.” Cas leans his head on the window. A glimpse through Dean’s memories would suggest that he’s at least not heterosexual. But Cas thought that best not to bring up. “But even if you _were_ ‘gay’ – which you’re not – it’s as natural as having brown hair or being a certain height. You were all made in my father’s image. And sexuality is part of your diversity as a species. It’s beautiful.”

Dean just changes that station on the radio. Cas wants to know what he’s thinking, he _knows_ that he can now, but it feels like a betrayal of trust to do so. Dean has said explicitly that he doesn’t like it. The angel is pretty sure he’s at least a little bit still human, because his stubbornness and curiosity win over. It doesn't help that Dean's thoughts are so  _loud_. 

Human consciousness is a complicated thing. When Castiel looks inside Dean’s mind, he says a lot of things. The past is easy to identify – it’s tinged a certain color, and the pain of hell still stings his memories. Dean’s thoughts echo like he’s projecting them into Cas. They do share a profound bond, and he thinks that's why it's so easy for Cas to map him.

 

<<Can he please make a move already? He knows I can’t… I would if I could. I tried to make it obvious. Jesus Christ. Get your shit together, Winchester. What would Sam say? What would _Dad_ say? He’d beat the gay right out of you… that’s for sure. Or, bi, or whatever. Just hold it together. He’s your best friend, isn't that more important? >>

Cas shudders. Dean swerves a little. Luckily, the roads are empty. “Are you alright?” He asks, feeling guilty.

“Fine.” Dean smiles. It's a bad lie.

“Pull the car over.”

“What?”

“I said,” Cas grumbles. “Pull the car over.”

“Cas, what’s wrong?" Dean asks. He gets no response. At the next exit, Dean pulls off into an empty parking lot.

This time, Cas kisses him. It’s a lot better than the first one, too. He _has_ kissed people before. And watched humanity for thousands of years. He knows what he’s doing. Dean melts into the kiss, and his hands twist in Cas’ hair. Dean tastes like cinnamon and cigarettes and something else. Dean is human. More than that, he is righteous. Dean is pure.

When they finally pull apart from each other, Dean looks pleased with himself. “I was wondering when you were gonna do that.”

 

At the motel, Sam is busy researching. Claire and him seem to be getting along well, which is a nice change. Sam asks why they bought an eighteen year-old girl a stuffed cat. Dean just laughs.


End file.
